WASHINGTON – President Donald Trump announced today that he has cancelled the F-35 deployment to the Vermont Air National Guard. According to our sources, Trump has done this as retribution for the complete void of praise and support he has received from the Vermont congressional delegation. Trump says, “Senators Leahy and Sanders along with Representative Welch have been very active in the opposition to all the great things I am doing for the country. They have worked to thwart my appointment of outstanding judges to our many courts. They vote against all the wonderful legislation I propose.”
We have learned that Senator Bernie Sanders denies Trump’s claim. Sanders said, “I have not been present for about 80% of the votes in the last several years, so how could I always be against him?” Clearly Bernie has been anywhere except his senate seat in Washington, DC as he travels far and wide chasing votes for his presidential aspirations and promoting socialistic programs of one type or another.
Trump also makes the point, “By cancelling the F-35s for Vermont I will have millions of dollars available for major military parades in many wonderful red-state cities across this nation. This is so important to demonstrate to the world that I, and only I, will ‘make America great again’.”
Sources inside the White House claim that Trump was unaware of local resistance to the F-35s, and once he learns that the people of Vermont don’t want them he may decide to reinstate the program as further punishment.
This is obviously fake news because Trump would never use the word thwart. That is high school vocabulary. Too bad though. It would be nice to cancel the F-35s.
Yay! It doesn’t matter why, so happy Trump cancelled the F-35!
If only we were a real news site! Ah well…