Syrup & Cows #095 – 3/31/19 – Discount Bin
Image Credits: Connor Byam.
Month: March 2019
Vermont Farmers Fear For Their Lives After AI Becomes Sentient and Goes Rogue
NORTH FERRISBURGH – Local dairy farmers have had to flee their homes in fear after an artificial insemination machine gained sentience and began attempting to […]
Developer Abandons Burlington CityPlace, Plans Underwater “LakePlace” Complex
BURLINGTON – After years of planning, false starts, public opposition, and loss of financing, developer Don Sinex has confirmed his intention to abandon Burlington’s CityPlace […]
New Data Shows People Who Spend All Their Money Have Less Money Remaining
WINOOSKI – In a stunning revelation that is changing everything about how Americans look at finance, a new study released last week has shown that […]
Mueller Report Reportedly Confirms Trump Not a Witch
WASHINGTON – While the full public release of the report has been blocked by Mitch McConnell and Senate Republicans, those who have read the entire […]
Vermont Company Begins Selling Organic Tick Proteins
WEST DOVER – When Jason Cimex first began keeping ticks in his home, his friends and family thought he was going buggy, but now that […]
Burlington Passes Resolution Condemning Canada For Not Exporting as Much Marijuana as Mexico
BURLINGTON – Much praise was heaped on Burlington, VT’s police force last week at a town hall meeting to address the opioid crisis. With fewer […]
Syrup & Cows #094 – 3/24/19 – Origin Story
Image Credits: Connor Byam.
State Will Fill Quechee Gorge With Nearby Mountain at Request of Flatlanders
WOODSTOCK – Vermont will flatten Suicide Six this fall and use the rocks and soil to fill the Quechee Gorge. “This multibillion dollar effort will […]
Hell Completely Freezes Over For First Time Since 2015
UNDERWORLD – With the cold temperatures lasting longer than usual this winter, many have been looking forward to the sight of a completely frozen Hell […]