5G Opponents to Hold Aluminum Foil Hat Fashion Show Fundraiser
AVERY’S GORE – Armed with new research from the Abacus Foundation, (the same group that started the Anti-Vax campaign, as well as the Anti-Con Trail […]
Month: September 2019
Millennial Refuses to Answer Phone Calls From Boomer Refusing to Return Text Messages
WILLISTON – Business has ground to a halt at international development giant RELEAF, as many internal communications are not being returned, responded to, or even […]
Syrup & Cows #118 – 9/8/19 – Praying Vermontis
Image Credits: Connor Byam.
Sanders Campaign Sues Switzerland Over Name of Capital City
BERN – Bernie Sanders’ campaign has filed a suit against the capital of Switzerland for use of the trademarked word “Bern.” Sanders has been using […]
Seven Days Involved In Massive Sasquatch Cover-Up
BRADFORD – The Creamery Bridge in Bradford, VT has been closed since 2018 thanks to an angry Sasquatch, but you’d never know it by reading […]
Feline Street Gangs Menace Southern Vermont
BRATTLEBORO – It’s hard to survive as a vagrant in Vermont, and no one knows that better than Vermont’s strays. “After a gang of feral […]
Vermont, Wisconsin Governors Embark on National Campaign to Promote Lactose Tolerance
MADISON, WI – Although no longer governor of Wisconsin, Scott Walker’s legacy will live on through a program he secretly developed with Vermont Governor Phil […]
Montpelier Police Detain “Armed” Man
MONTPELIER – In the wake of the Capitol Complex in Montpelier experiencing a lockdown because an “armed man” was seen entering a State Building, local […]
Satire Writers Take Labor Day Off, Refuse to Wr
WINOOSKI – Despite very clear orders from their editor, the writers of Vermont’s premiere local satire site The Winooski have refused to finish any articles […]
Syrup & Cows #117 – 9/1/19 – Meetings
Image Credits: Connor Byam.