MONTPELIER – Now that the vote counting in Vermont is fully completed and the results are final, Vt. Secretary of State Jim Condos reports that there was no voter fraud problem in Vermont because Vermont cities and towns used separate voting boxes for voters to use in casting real and fraudulent ballots.
Condos reports that, as usual, Vermonters are so good about doing their civic duty, and those who chose to cast fraudulent ballots behaved responsibly in using the right box to place their ballots in. “Local election officials really stepped up in advance and accommodated voters who would want to cast fraudulent ballots by adding “Fake Ballot” boxes at the polling places, and the fraudulent voters complied by placing their ballots in the appropriately-marked box.” He added, “The fraudulent voters are to be commended for doing the right thing.”
Once the voting was over, local ballot counters did not have waste time trying to separate the fraudulent ballots from the legal ones, Condos reported. Instead, they just took the “Fake Ballot” boxes and threw them in the dumpster, leading to a clean ballot count, added Condos.
Fraudulent voter Tray Trache lauded the ease and convenience with which he was able to cast multiple fake ballots for President Trump. “I made 100 copies of my mail-in ballot for our true President,” said Trache, “and I brought them to town hall and the helpful people there showed me the right ballot box to stuff them in. It was marked ‘Insert Fake Ballots Here.’ It was so easy, any fool could do it.”
“Old-fashioned yankee ingenuity saved the day for us in Vermont once again,” said Condos.