The Winooski

The Winooski

Locally Sourced Organic Vermont Satire

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Articles by The Winooski

Cris Ericson Unveils New Policy Platform in Advance of Run for Governor, House, Senate, Treasurer, Auditor, and Secretary of State

February 23, 2019 The Winooski 2

CHESTER – After the statewide legalization of marijuana, perennial candidate Cris Ericson, of the Marijuana Party, has had to pivot to a new platform. She […]

VT Governor Declares State of Emergency Over Loss of Veto Power

February 22, 2019 The Winooski 0

MONTPELIER – Vermont Governor Phil Scott has declared a state of emergency today over the inability to veto House Bill H.57, which would codify into […]

Satire Site Unable to Post Anything Funny About Abortion

February 21, 2019 The Winooski 0

WINOOSKI – The biggest news story of this week left many local satirists scratching their heads as to how to cover the passing of H.57 […]

Burlington Police Chief Replaces All Lieutenants With Actors From New York

February 20, 2019 The Winooski 2

BURLINGTON – When Burlington Police Deputy Chief Shawn Burke left to run South Burlington’s police department, many were skeptical about the decision to hire a […]

Bernie Sanders Announces He Will Run For President as a Republican

February 19, 2019 The Winooski 1

COLCHESTER – Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders announced his 2020 bid for the presidency today on Vermont Public Radio. He promised that many things will be […]

AirBnB Guest Confused about January Weather in Vermont

February 18, 2019 The Winooski 0

Alburgh – The increasing number of AirBnB owners across Vermont know that visitors come in all types—and hope that they don’t do any serious damage […]

Syrup & Cows #089 – 2/17/19 – Layers

February 17, 2019 The Winooski 0

Image Credits: Connor Byam.

Burlington Free Press Reclassified as “Blog,” Begins Reposting Old Articles

February 16, 2019 The Winooski 1

BURLINGTON – Former newspaper The Burlington Free Press announced yesterday that it will officially be designated as a “blog with print option” from now on. They celebrated this […]

Christian Landlord Fights “Uninhabitable” Ruling, Claims Rental Unit Condition is “Biblical”

February 15, 2019 The Winooski 0

SWANTON – When the local town health officer declared Chris Judge’s barn “uninhabitable” and informed the tenants that they would need to vacate, Judge made […]

Married Couples Push For Holiday to Celebrate Their Kind of Non-Romantic Love

February 14, 2019 The Winooski 0

ESSEX – A group of married couples in Essex is trying to create momentum for a new holiday in addition to Valentine’s Day that would […]

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Recent Posts

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