Bored Writer Exaggerates News Story During Alien Invasion
WINOOSKI – A local satire writer is being accused of going beyond the bounds of normal satire and completely fabricating a story with no tether […]
Articles by The Winooski
Plants-Rights Group Launches Campaign Against Weeding
SHELBURNE – A Shelburne-based, grass-roots political advocacy group called “Plants are People” has launched a new campaign to discourage Vermonters from weeding their gardens. The […]
Summer Officially Cancels Vermont Visit After Weeks of Delay
WINOOSKI – Fans of summer are going to be disappointed this year. The popular season, which was scheduled to arrive in Vermont for a three […]
Mosquito Unable to Find Decent New Spot for a Bite
GRAND ISLE – It seems as though this year mosquitoes are enjoying a bounty harvest of human blood for their ongoing feast of evil, but […]
Syrup & Cows #106 – 6/16/19 – Spelling Bee
Image Credits: Connor Byam.
South Canadian President Challenges Donald Trump to a Fight in the UFC Octagon
SOUTH CANADA – In a tweet that most initially assumed was a joke, President Charlene “Skunk” Bedard of South Canada has challenged US President Donald […]
Vermont Supreme Court to Hear Testimony on Pronunciation of “GIF”
MONTPELIER – After years of debate, the greatest divide in our modern society may finally be getting an official, legal decision next week. The Vermont […]
Burlington Mayor Not Listening to F-35 Objections Due to Hearing Loss From F-35s
BURLINGTON – After an unexpected, and unexpectedly noisy, flyover by the proposed F-35 jets recently, the already fierce opposition has grown even louder to the […]
US Women’s Soccer Team Agrees to Wear Prosthetic Penises in Exchange for Higher Salaries
CHICAGO – After winning the Women’s World Cup this week the US Women’s National Soccer Team may be getting a rise in salary, thanks to […]
Gov. Scott Gets Papers Mixed Up, Accidentally Vetoes Wrong Bill
MONTPELIER – In a curious moment for Vermont politics, Governor Phil Scott has accidentally vetoed a bill on an issue that he has pushed for […]