Bernie Sanders Probably Going to Win in 2020, Turns Down Presidency in Advance
WASHINGTON, D.C. – With every poll showing Vermont Senator Bernie Sanders as the clear front-runner in the 2020 presidential race, the congressman has decided to […]
Businesses Worry Vermonters Won’t Be Able to Put Aside Gratitude on Black Friday
WILLISTON – As many Vermonters sat down to family dinners on Thursday and celebrated their abundance, some business owners were concerned that some of those […]
Ungrateful Person Anxious About Upcoming Family Meal
WINOOSKI – A local cashier at the University Mall is nervous about getting together with family and friends, because they may be forced to lie […]
Burlington Begins Annual Switch-Over to Winter Roads
BURLINGTON – Drivers may need a few extra minutes on their commutes this week as the city of Burlington begins switching over its all-season roads […]
Growing Concern for Vermont as South Canada Doubles Military Spending, Troops
SOUTH CANADA – Sources close to Vermont Governor Phil Scott say that he is considering making a strong statement to South Canada after a recent […]
Man Objects to His Gender in Satirical News Article
WINOOSKI – Vermont’s premiere local satire site The Winooski came under fire this week from one of its imaginary subjects. A man featured in today’s article […]
Syrup & Cows #024 – 11/19/17
Image Credits: Connor Byam.
UVM Eliminates Entire $4M Deficit By Cutting 6 Music and Dance Classes
BURLINGTON – In a sudden and unexpected move, the University of Vermont has completely solved its huge deficit crisis by cancelling six fine arts classes […]
Protests Over Essex High School’s Portrayal of Law Enforcement in “Les Mis”
ESSEX JUNCTION – Hundreds of Vermonters arrived at Essex High School last night armed with protest signs and singing the songs of angry men in […]
USDA Threatens to Pulls Funding From Vermont Over Animal Sanctuaries
WASHINGTON – In a strongly worded letter sent to the state of Vermont and to several towns including East Burke, Springfield, and Woodstock, the United […]