DETROIT – VT Senator Bernie Sanders is close to selecting a candidate for vice-president were he to receive the Democratic nomination for president, and according to sources inside the Sanders camp, his selection is likely to be musician Cardi B. Sander and B have been meeting regularly, in fact several times a day from the looks of everyone’s social media feeds, and insiders say the choice could be the boost his campaign needs to put Sanders in the lead.
“Some people are saying that Bernie’s too old,” said one high level aide, “but we think we can counter that with someone who is too young. Literally. I mean, she’s 26, so legally she could’t even assume the presidency, but as the administration has shown us, the Constitution isn’t really a set of strict rules, but more of a guideline to use when needed.”
“I would love to run with Senator Bernie,” B told reporters who followed her out of a club last night. “I mean, even though he’s like all in with the dad jokes, he’s been fighting for what we need as a people for since, like, before my parents were born. I was like, Bernie, you need some Cardi B up in this campaign, and he was all like, my doctor said I need some Cardi O, and I was like, never say that again. But it was cute how funny he thought that was. I like him.”
Senator Sanders himself would not comment on the rumors, and said he is still considering his options, though in the past he has said he would like to run with a female candidate. Opponents of the choice have pointed out B’s lack of political experience, however others have pointed out that the rapper has more experience in the political arena than the sitting US President, and that her clothing line is already more successful than any of the Trump businesses.
It could be up to a year before any official announcements are made, as VP choices are typically finalized in the weeks leading up to the conventions, so we won’t know for a while how likely a Sanders-B ticket really is.