All Children Safe After Most Recent Yeti Attack

MORETOWN – No children were injured after a yeti picked up the school bus they were riding on and threw it into a ditch on the side of Moretown Common Road yesterday afternoon. Police arrived to the scene quickly and managed to fight off the sasquatch by making loud noise and throwing snowballs at the monster.

This new attack comes after years of denial by news outlet Seven Days, who still claim that there is no such thing as a sasquatch or a yeti. Reporters once again claimed that it was all a hoax, despite the multiple livestream and TikTok videos featuring the snow beast.

“The signal is so spotty in Moretown, I’m hesitant to believe anything that claims to be ‘livestreamed’ from that area,” said reporter Sasha Goldstein, who has written several articles about the lack of abominable snow monsters in the area. “This sounds unlikely at best.”

The yeti was unavailable for comment, having been driven back into the woods for the time being.

Image Credits: VTDigger.

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