The Winooski

The Winooski

Locally Sourced Organic Vermont Satire

  • Home
  • Vermont Life
    • Burlington
    • Montpelier
    • Southern Vermont
  • National
  • South Canada
  • Syrup & Cows
  • Contact

Burlington

North Korean Missile Misses Vermont By Only 6000 Miles

December 1, 2017 The Winooski 1

PYONGYANG – Many Vermonters are putting bunkers on their Christmas lists this season after a North Korean missile missed the state by less than 6000 […]

Burlington Police Ask Public For Help in Search for Missing BTC Proposal

November 30, 2017 The Winooski 1

BURLINGTON – The Burlington police department has issued a public alert in the search for a missing proposal this week. The Burlington Telecom proposal is […]

Whale Tails Sculptor Asks City to Excavate Rest of Statues

November 29, 2017 The Winooski 0

SOUTH BURLINGTON – Vermont artist Jim Sardonis is asking the city of South Burlington to excavate the land around Reverence, his famous whale sculpture that can be […]

Businesses Worry Vermonters Won’t Be Able to Put Aside Gratitude on Black Friday

November 24, 2017 The Winooski 0

WILLISTON – As many Vermonters sat down to family dinners on Thursday and celebrated their abundance, some business owners were concerned that some of those […]

Burlington Begins Annual Switch-Over to Winter Roads

November 22, 2017 The Winooski 0

BURLINGTON – Drivers may need a few extra minutes on their commutes this week as the city of Burlington begins switching over its all-season roads […]

UVM Eliminates Entire $4M Deficit By Cutting 6 Music and Dance Classes

November 18, 2017 The Winooski 0

BURLINGTON – In a sudden and unexpected move, the University of Vermont has completely solved its huge deficit crisis by cancelling six fine arts classes […]

Protests Over Essex High School’s Portrayal of Law Enforcement in “Les Mis”

November 17, 2017 The Winooski 0

ESSEX JUNCTION – Hundreds of Vermonters arrived at Essex High School last night armed with protest signs and singing the songs of angry men in […]

Vermont Hoping to Keep People From Leaving, Entering the State

November 15, 2017 The Winooski 0

SOUTH BURLINGTON – In an effort to keep their best and brightest from leaving the state, many Vermont communities are enacting programs designed to encourage […]

Democrats Sweep National Elections on Pro-Vermont Platform

November 8, 2017 The Winooski 0

MONTPELIER – Vermont Democrats, and even their Republican Governor Phil Scott, are praising the results of yesterday’s national elections as a positive referendum on the […]

Burlington City Council Banquet Cancelled After Councillors Unable to Choose Main Course

November 7, 2017 The Winooski 1

BURLINGTON – An awards banquet hosted by the Burlington City Council was postponed indefinitely after the 12 councilors were unable to come to a decision […]

Posts navigation

« 1 … 22 23 24 … 28 »

The Winooski E-mail Updates!

Check out the best of The Winooski over at VTDigger!

Other Places to Find Us

  • View thewinooski’s profile on Facebook
  • View thefakewinooski’s profile on Twitter
  • View thewinooski’s profile on Instagram

Recent Posts

  • Texas Legislature Passes Emergency “Don’t Say Gun” Law May 25, 2022
  • Burlington Announces New High School To Be Built at 1 North Avenue August 19, 2021
  • Syrup & Cows #207 – 5/24/21 – First Day Back May 24, 2021
  • Syrup & Cows #206 – 5/16/21 – The Search Continues May 16, 2021
  • Syrup & Cows #205 – 5/9/21 – Unrecognizable May 9, 2021

Recent Comments

  • Strangest Laws in Vermont - Liner Law on Six Weird Vermont Laws You Have to Read to Believe
  • 2inscrutable on Breaking News: Other States Also Have Weather
  • Robert on Six Weird Vermont Laws You Have to Read to Believe
  • Hugh Kidden on Burlington Announces New High School To Be Built at 1 North Avenue
  • Randy Fullam on Burlington Announces New High School To Be Built at 1 North Avenue

Back Issues

Copyright © 2025 | WordPress Theme by MH Themes