VT Solves Sign Shortage by Only Labeling Road Areas with No Bumps

MONTPELIER – After a negotitation breakdown with the governor of New Hampshire, Vermont Governor Phil Scott has come up with a new plan to solve the growing sign shortage crisis. For the past several weeks the state has struggled to procure the necessary signage to label every pothole and bump that almost cover their roads and highways. But under this new plan, all existing “BUMP” signs will be taken down and instead labled “NO BUMP.” These new signs will be placed on sections of street without any potholes.

“This is going to save the state a lot of money,” Gov. Scott said with a smile. “Zuck spoke to VTrans, and they’re on board with the plan. They’re estimating a 91% reduction in signage needs with this new system, and all it’s going to cost taxpayers is a couple of bucks for black paint.”

Vermont residents seem to be hopeful about the new plan, with many expressing support online for the new signage.

“Even when there isn’t a sign, I always figure there’s a potential bump in the road,” said online commenter ronaldvegan84. “Having a sign to tell me when there’s a spot of smooth pavement will actually be more helpful. I’ll know when to take a sip of my kombucha without spilling it all over my jumper.”

The new signage is expected to be installed over the next two weeks, and VTrans will launch an awareness campaign at that time to alert drivers to watch for the “NO” part of the “NO BUMP” signs.

“We’re aware for the possible confusion, especially for drivers on their phones or drinking their kombuchas, who may only see the signs out of the corners of their eyes,” said VTrans Secretary Joe Flynn. “Hopefully the internet campain we are planning will let those drivers on their phones know that the sign they sort of see may not be the sort of sign they thought they sort of saw.”

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