CHARLOTTE – A local couple living in Charlotte has completely ended tourism in the state of Vermont by adding a solar panel to their backyard. Kathryn Nadeau and her husband Frank had the panel installed to bring down their utility costs, and also because they hate the economy and all of their friends and neighbors.
“We feel that this will be very good for the environment,” said Kathryn, “and of course we know that there is now no longer any reason for anyone to visit the state due to the natural beauty being ruined. We just hate people so much, and we hope no one ever comes near us again.”
Their next-door neighbor Ruth Poulin said she is unable to live near the solar panel due to emotional distress. “It’s horrible. Why would they put that solar panel up in the yard? Now I can’t see anything anymore. We’re putting our house on the market and moving to New Hampshire.”
“I’m glad they’re going,” said Frank Nadeau. “We never liked them anyway. In fact, we hate all Vermonters, which is why we put up the panel.”
The Vermont Department of Tourism and Marketing has reported a sixty-four percent drop in tourism since the panel was completed.
Well, that tears it. I’m moving, too. I thought the “no billboards” laws were bad, but this is the straw that broke the camel’s Hump for me.