COLCHESTER – Two Costco employees were fired today after accidentally putting out a display of Halloween-themed items over the weekend. The display included costumes, candy, and spooky decorations. When customers pointed out the seasonally inappropriate decor, a store manager quickly took down the display using a forklift and offered the offended customers free churros.
“It was tough, you know?” said store manager Rex Trelarge. “You never want to have to let anyone go, but this was about as bad as it gets. Halloween? In October?! The store should be full of red and green lights, jingle bells, and animatronic Santas that come to life and freak you out when you walk past. I don’t even know where they found any Halloween stuff. By September those items should have been packed away to sell again next summer.”
The employees who were fired said they were only responding to a customer request for Halloween costumes.
“This one dad came in with his kids looking for costumes,” said one of the employees who does not wish to release their name to the public at this time. “I know it was the first week of October and nobody is thinking about Halloween anymore, but even if this guy was months late thinking about the holiday that is still several weeks away, it didn’t seem right to refuse him when I knew we had some Halloween stuff in the back. And then I figured other people might also be running late with their shopping, so me and Trevor, oh wait, don’t put Trevor, put, umm, Max Thunder. Yeah, me and Max Thunder put up a small display of stuff, just in case. I honestly didn’t think it was that big of a deal.”
Since learning about the free churros, dozens of other customers have come forward claiming trauma from seeing the display. Costco has agreed to offer a free churro to any customer whose accounts show a purchase at their warehouse from last Saturday between the hours of 11 AM and 4 PM. To retreieve your churro, walk up to the customer service desk with your receipt and simply say “Merry Christmas.”