Trump Announces New Initiative to Fight Social Climate Change

WASHINGTON DC – During his State of the Union address last evening, President Trump surprised many viewers by announcing a new focus on combating social climate change. He was not expected to bring up the issue at all, but has now said that all evidence points to a devastating future if current social climate trends continue.

The president called attention to the number of women currently in Congress, as well as the increasingly diverse US population as indicators that the social climate is changing drastically. He then went on to mention conversations with several affluent white males, noting how hot the water they were in seemed to be getting.

“I know I’m not alone in noticing that the social storms heading my way are getting larger and larger,” Trump said during the speech. “If we don’t act now, it could be too late. We need to think about the kind of world we are leaving for our children. At this point, I just don’t know if it’s going to be a good one. I’m sorry, but I just don’t know. By 2050, scientists are now claiming that the Bro may become extinct. This is a national and a global crisis.”

Democrats responded negatively to the speech, claiming that there is no evidence of man-made social climate change. “Whatever climate change there is here in the senate,” said Speaker Pelosi, “was not brought about by men.”

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