Zoning Committee Warns “Building Sidewalks Leads to Building Skyscrapers”
FAIRFIELD – The zoning committee in Fairfield has issued a dire warning to rural communities across the state, claiming that once they begin building sidewalks […]
Month: February 2019
Vermont White Supremacists Deface Tanning Salon in South Burlington
SOUTH BURLINGTON – Following the defacement of several buildings, including Ohavi Zedek Synagogue and the Pride Center of Vermont, a new target has been vandalized […]
Trump Announces New Initiative to Fight Social Climate Change
WASHINGTON DC – During his State of the Union address last evening, President Trump surprised many viewers by announcing a new focus on combating social […]
State of Vermont Sued By Hackers Guild for Terrible Internet Speeds
MONTPELIER – In what will prove to be a precedent setting case, no matter the result, the Hackers Guild has filed a suit against the […]
NFL Unable to Prevent Tom Brady From Obtaining the Soul Stone
ATLANTA – Despite a lackluster attempt to stop his team of villains, The Winooski can report that Thamos “Tom” Brady has acquired the Soul Stone, the […]
Syrup & Cows #087 – 2/3/19 – God’s Thermostat
Image Credits: Connor Byam.
Town of Punxsutawney Hires Vampire Hunters After Groundhog Casts No Shadow in Bright Sunlight
PUNXSUTAWNEY – A scene of chaos, terror, and confusion unfolded in a small Pennsylvania town this morning after a local celebrity rodent failed to see […]
South Canada to Create Artificial Lake in Hopes of Luring Champ
SOUTH CANADA – As the legislative season begins in the minute nation of South Canada, a new bill was passed this week to create an […]