Vermont DMV Concerned Over Increased Auto-Immune Systems

MONTPELIER – Health care providers are encouraging Vermonters to exercise and walk more to bolster their auto-immune systems while isolated in their homes. DMV Director Cheve Roleyea expressed concern that this could cause his department to see a decrease in revenue. “Making people immune to autos is contrary to our agency’s mission. Imagine everyone walking or riding bicycles; the ripple effect would be devastating!”

Roleyea stated that if this should occur, his department would request approval of licensing, registration, insurance, and inspections of walkers, joggers, runners, and bicyclists. When reminded that DMV can promulgate its own rules he replied, “Really?”

The Vermont Coalition for Auto-Immunity responded with a recorded message by CEO Dr. Whitey Sell, that “Car-Diology and Auto-Immunity should take precedence over DMV concerns as people should be running on all cylinders.” DMV Director Roleyea retorted “Just another effort by do-gooders to disrupt our power-train base.”

DMV Press Liaison Henri Fjord released a statement in support of the new pedestrian registrations, saying, “After all which arteries are more important? The ones we drive on, or the ones in your body?”