BURLINGTON – Yesterday, Mayor Sanders issued an upbeat report on the state of the city. After five years the Great Pandemic seems to be over. The Mayor praised the citizens of the city for social distancing over the last five years and called on all to join in a great celebration of togetherness on July 4.
With full out commercial construction ready to resume, Mayor Sanders indicated that the major priority will be housing. Virtually all construction had stopped with the exception of the Mild Case Mandated Quarantine (MCMQ) Hilton built at the empty mall site.
With deaths limited during the crisis thanks to the vigorous social distancing, few housing openings occurred for that reason. In fact, with 12,825 divorces and 15,001 births in the City in the last five years the need for housing is greater than ever.
Sanders stated “when Jane and I split because she could not deal with the loss of consortium, due to the worldwide shortage of Viagra, at least we already had two homes.” The Mayor further explained that while many Burlingtonians have separate cottages, the divorcees in town tended to be young apartment dwellers who had not yet purchased one. This has skyrocketed demand. The need is further accelerated by a demand for houses with separate wings for children. Parents have started to go mad being with their children 24/7 for years. The birthrate, of course, has also increased the need for larger homes and apartments.
Asked if he planned to run for President again after President Trump lifts martial law and finally allows a new election in 2026, the Mayor said, “Sisters and brothers, I am still with you and ready to take on Joe, once again.”
Image Credits: 802_VT.