F-35s and BlackHawks Buzz UVM Green

BURLINGTON – A Friday, August 14 press conference organized by Burlington City Councilors turned into a melee after President Trump ordered a military response to protect counter protesters.

The press conference was to be held directly in front of Waterman Building, on the UVM campus. It was intended to demonstrate the community concern about the impending reopening of the school to students.
The press conference never happened. Counter protesters immediately shouted down the speakers. Gathered six feet away, they held up signs indicating their insistence that school reopen. The most prominent signs were those that said “Don’t stop Fraternity Parties” and “Unmask your true desire to get rid of students forever”.

President Trump was alerted to the situation while golfing in New Jersey. He quickly tweeted,“ I won’t let Antifa and the Biden, Kamala, Sanders leftists stop schools from reopening. I direct federal law enforcement personnel to socialist Burlington Vermont in order to protect the free speech and safety of those brave patriots who know that college must go on. There will be college football at UVM this Fall! I call on the Green Mountain Boys to fly their F-35s over the campus and as directed by our already in place drones, force the provocateurs of that campus.

Blackhawk helicopters dropping smoke bombs and F-35s soon swept over the school green. Black sedans with men dressed in black suits, arrested the press conference participants who were largely long white-haired senior citizens. Their whereabouts cannot be confirmed at this time though Flight-tracker indicated that a C-35 transport plane had filed a flight plan from BTV to a well know federal black site in Palm Beach Florida.

Senators Sanders and Leahy and Representative Welch are all on vacation and could not be reached for comment. Governor Scott was busy with his Friday press conference discussing masks with Dr. Levine. Mayor Weinberger was nowhere to be found. Rumor had it that he was in secret negotiations with Brookfield Properties about who owns the mineral rights to the downtown hole in the ground.