God Participates in National School Walkout Day
WINOOSKI – In a major blow to the gun lobby, the NRA, and congressional Republicans, God has come out in support of increased gun legislation […]
United States Transfers NATO Membership to South Canada
SOUTH CANADA – The North Atlantic Treaty Organization (NATO) has a new member, although the number of countries involved has not changed. Despite a recent […]
Child Lost for 3 Years in Laser Tag Arena Finally Found
COLCHESTER – Three years ago 7-year-old Ripley Stark went to a birthday party at Spare Time in Colchester and never came home. She had entered […]
Syrup & Cows #040 – 3/11/18
Image Credits: Connor Byam.
Claiming 10% Increase in Savings, Governor Scott Orders VT Clocks Set 1 Hour, 6 Minutes Ahead
MONTPELIER – While most of the rest of the country sets its clocks forward one hour tonight, the state of Vermont will experiment with setting […]
AG Jeff Sessions Sues Vermont Maple Industry
WASHINGTON, DC – Attorney General Jeff Sessions is suing the State of Vermont Maple Industry, alleging the state’s proprietary claims violate Federal Law. “This is […]
Burlington Landlords Begin Renting Out Awnings and Eaves as Housing Market Worsens
BURLINGTON – In the midst of one of the worst housing crises Burlington has ever seen, some local landlords are resorting to renting out “rooms” […]
Vermonters Overwhelmingly Elect Putin Governor on Town Meeting Day
MONTEPELIER – The results are in, and now-Governor-elect Vladimir Putin has won Vermont’s gubernatorial election by over 42 percentage points. Putin took the race with […]
Local Voter Researches Major Issues on Phone in Voting Booth
SEARSBURG – Dee Lehrer, of Searsburg, VT, spent many minutes in a voting booth at the Twin Valley Elementary School in Wilmington this morning trying […]
Burlington, Vermont Wins Acting Oscar For Pretending Not to Be Conservative
LOS ANGELES – The city of Burlington, Vermont took home an Oscar last night at the 90th Academy Awards for its role as “Progressive, Forward-Thinking […]